I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
I had to cum in my sink.
Randomize
