Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
You're gonna die alone anyway. Even if you do meet a man, they die earlier than women. Best case, you have to deal with grieving over his death and then die alone a couple years later. Worst case, you get a terminal illness and he divorces you, leaving you to die alone anyway.
Thanks, mom.
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
Randomize
