it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
Tornado booty call.. dedication
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
He ain't mine yet. Gotta have a third date before I pee on him and mark territory.
Oh. Wait. That happened on the second date.
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
Randomize