If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
I just met his mom for the first time with a hang over. Then we went to watch his 8 year old cousin get baptized. Apparently his family loves me. I should drink more often.
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