I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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