big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
genius alert. I just invented a contraption made of toilet paper and rubber bands that makes it so your balls don't stick to your leg when you wake up from sleeping. I call it, The Balldozer
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
Randomize
