That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
I left a bag of circus animal cookies in my car all day. they melted together into on giant cookie. this could either be the best or worst thing ever
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
Randomize