The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
You've picked up chicks by quoting metal bands
When they're drunk they believe it's Shakespeare...enjoy the simple things
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
Randomize
