no, he came in my armpit
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
Randomize
