It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
You are the funniest drunk Jew I know. Never in my life have I witnessed someone respond, "Is your dick kosher?" while being picked-up on.
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
Randomize
