paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
Randomize
