hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
Randomize
