I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
Randomize
