Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
Randomize