I wanna bring you to show and tell
This is not my ceiling
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Randomize
