Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
Randomize
