I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
Randomize
