so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
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