i just wanna soil my oats bro
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
He texts me "what are you wearing" in the middle of the workday, so naturally I assume he's kidding and respond "the blood of my enemies" #foreveralone
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
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