she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
Randomize
