Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
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