Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
I think drinking White Russians at half past four in the afternoon is perfectly acceptable. I'd bought a LOT of milk and cream that needs to be used up. Resourceful, check, fuckable, check. You have a great girlfriend here pal.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
Randomize
