Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
Randomize
