Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
The second he texted me with "*dry humps you!*" I knew any relationship we might have had was over.
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
Randomize