We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
Randomize
