Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
Randomize
