p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
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