ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
what's the name of the guy at the bank you blew to get the lower interest rate?
um. wrong number, but good luck with your loan
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
Randomize
