haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
She said, after pronouncing how sober she was, and I quote 'Take this bag, it's so heavy it's like 500 degrees! Wait, is it time to go? Can I run? I think I can run!' Then she ran away.
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
Success! We fucked roommates!
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
It took me years of patience and pilates and yoga and flirting to land that penis. So yeah, I’m going to ride it into the sunset and live orgasmically ever after
Randomize
