I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize
