Whoa Z and x make the same sound
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
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