Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
Randomize
