you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
Randomize