she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
I just dropped a condom on the floor at costco in front of my girlfriend and her husband. Today is not going to go well.
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
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