u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
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