So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
Randomize
