I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
I put the child locks on after I put you in the car and you then screamed, "I am a Phoenix, you can't restrain me. I NEED TO FLY!"
Randomize