What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
Randomize
