Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
Dude this girl just said she'd take me to pleasure town while giving me head
Will Ferrell is probably jerking himself off somewhere wishing he was you
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
Is it a coincidence that the reminder on my phone to take my birth control is "I'm ready to party" from Bridesmaids?
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
Randomize
