no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
Randomize
