You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
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That's how twitter works, right?
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
I think a kid would responsible me up
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
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