it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
that shirt you're wearing that says "officially single" makes me think you'll be that way for a really long fucking time.
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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