can you come get me and bring me shorts and a shirt
maybe shoes and water too
oh and maybe a noose to hang myself
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
