So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize
