Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
Randomize
