Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
I saw a sign that said worlds largest frying pan next exit. Way to do your fucking part Iowa.
How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
Randomize
