you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
She left me with blue balls so I jerked off on her french toast in the morning.
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
Ketchup is God's man juice
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
Randomize