I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
I was walking around outside with a basket of eggs. I feel like little house on the prairie: hungover edition.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
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