so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
i black out too much to be "responsible"
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
