btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
where am i from again
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
Just used the salt in the bottom of my mcdonalds bag from last night on the eggs i made this morning. Way too hungover for this
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
Randomize
